holistikissim

You are in control

Stop rushing to reach the finish line or you’ll miss everything.

The journey…what a small word to define everything happening in life. We can always hear what matter isn’t the destination but the journey and we should enjoy it. Not an easy thing to do at all.

We all act like we have everything planned and everything is going according to it but my friend, one thing that I have realised and learnt is that we are all lost. We are all moving forwards like driving in the fog.

Do you feel like you are not really in control of your life? That you are only responding to what is happening to you? Not really being able to make your own choices? That life is living you while it should be the other way around?

I know how it is because I have felt like that most of my life. I was making choices and deciding for myself but there were so many things to take into consideration that I felt I was only reacting to life the best I could. And now that I am accountable for everything that is happening to me, I have to admit that lots of things have change.

Only you can make that journey for yourself because that’s simply your life. It has been made for you and you only.

You are the main character of your own story so stop waiting for life to manage you and for that magic switch to be activated.

If you feel down or that you are at your lowest, think about that: you can only go up so start taking actions right now.

Every single actions you take as consequences, even the smallest ones so start taking the right actions. Stop saying you don’t know which ones you have to take because you know. See the big pictures but before that you have a multitude of small actions, steps that you can take to put you on the right path.

Oh yeah, I have thought like you before, and believe me I still think negatively about lots of stuff but now, it’s only for a short period of time, for a single moment because I have train myself to stop seeing all the difficulties first and now my desire to change just takes over.

HEY! I am not better than you. I am not cleverer; I am not more intelligent or stronger or tougher. We always think that others have a better life because they have something more than we do, and that is just so wrong. If some have been successful to build the life they have always dreamed of, first not many of us have that and second, it is only because they have developed a really strong focus and changed their mind-set so don’t waste much time on unnecessary things. And not because they have been gifted from birth.

You are not like you were when you were born, you have learnt so much since, well the rest of your life is exactly the same. I have screwed up soooo much in the past, I am still screwing up a lot and I will keep on screwing up. We are HUMAN for fu** sake meaning we are full of flaws and not perfect.

Stop looking at Social Media with envy to all those people who are showing off their success, you don’t know what is happening in the background. People only show you what they want you to see. Including myself. I can assure you that my life is not “La vie en rose”. Every day I have doubts, anxiety, stress, fears but what makes you stronger is how you react to those.

When you feel those, what do you do? Do you go in your bed or sofa, grab some snacks and watch TV? Well, like that, for sure, you won’t be improving and making them go away. Let me make you a promise, nothing will get better if you don’t anything so move your butt now!

In Business there is a saying that the Status Quo is the worst thing because if you remain there, your business just dies. You are asking yourself how is that possible if your business is already running? Well simple. Because your competition is getting ahead of you, because you don’t try to do better for your activity and for your clients and they will notice it very quickly. Also, if the business has investors and shareholders, they want to see improvements, have a better return on investment so if nothing is moving forward they might ask to get their money back and no more investors will come forward. And that’s how a business dies.

Let’s compare it to yourself in the ocean. If you don’t swim you remain at the same place, lost and alone. And at some point you will be too tired and you will drown. While if you start swimming, in any direction, even you don’t know where you are going, you increase the odds of finding lands  As simple as that.

Now let’s come back to the state of mind thingy. So, the difference is that now I am just fed up with the person I became and have been for years, managed by my inner demons and traumas that I happily let take over. Keeping on living in fear with drugs, lies to cover up my shit and other lies. You will just lose yourself little by little to become someone you don’t even know because you are not that person. It is like an alter ego, but really not in the good sense of the word.

You can create yourself an alter ego that will empower you, making you feel more confident, making you do stuff that you would usually never do like conduct a project or business your normal self would never do, introduce yourself to a woman or man to flirt and ask for a phone number or a date, feeling more confident to go to a party where you don’t know anyone, doing that presentation in front of many people…but there is also the wrong alter ego. The one that you create to hide your…well mister Hyde or your Lucifer to stay in the modern TV show.

Create your new self as you created that wrong you.

I have heard something amazing, again from Dr. Jordan Peterson who explains that being good isn’t just being good. It is to be able to control that monster we all have inside of us. Being a dangerous person but being able to control all that darkness and bring light to this world. I just love it. If I wanted to, I could just let my inner monster takes over and being absolutely terrible, dreadful but I choose not to because that is not what I want to offer to the world.

Take it step by step.

  • If you feel like you are addicted to something, the first step is start documenting yourself about people you succeeding to fight back, like myself and I am really not the only one, not the first and not the last. The internet is full of people giving away for free their own experience. It just requires a real NO and some few clicks and then start taking actions for yourself. Change your mind-set by telling yourself that what you are addicted to is making you weaker, that it is controlling you. No one wants to be controlled. I know it is easier said than done but by not doing anything about it, you will never put yourself in position to succeed.
  • You hate not being in shape? The first step is to get out of your couch, stop eating all the shitty food and start moving your butt. You don’t need much to start. As I explained in other posts and in The Training tab, I started by going for walks every day. Then I have added up little by little but you need to start somewhere.
  • You hate your current job? The first step is to make a list of your strengths, a real list you write down on paper, believe me it’s much better than doing on your computer because you will see it every day you pass by it. Write down your resume highlighting those strengths and start applying to those great positions. Again, Internet is full of it because companies wants profiles that are ready for new challenges. And taking the risk is showing that you are ready.
  • Oh no, you think you won’t be able to make it into that new position? It is too hard? How can you know before even trying? Just TRY!!! One thing is sure is that if you don’t try you have 100% chance or risk to not make it. Again, maybe not easy, but simple.

Start creating your new self, right now. Again, I know it is much easier said than done but we can’t keep complaining about things we hate and not do anything to change those things. I have put myself into victimhood for a long part of my life and the only thing that it brought me was a weak mind, sadness and wasted time.

Yes, you will struggle, yes it will be hard and yes you will make mistakes but every time you make one you will get back up and you will be stronger and tougher because you will learn from those mistakes. And that’s when you will realise how fu**ing strong you are.

  • Change your attitude
  • Change your mind-set
  • Change your way of thinking
  • Change your way of seeing life
  • Change the perspectives

Take example on people who made it, on people you admire and understand how they did it.

Stop being a coward, stop being a victim of life and become the best you, the best version of yourself.

Imagine how proud you will be when you will be that new person. That improved version of your old self.

If you struggle to see it, I would be more than happy to help. Contact me and we’ll see together what we can do. I may not have the best advice, I am also learning but I realise I have a real strength to motive people, to make them see what they don’t see in themselves.

You are enough my friend, enough to become anything and anyone you want. I believe in you, more than you can imagine.

This is brought to you by kindness, altruism, love and blessing.

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